well...i've been enjoying my so-called "break"...it kinda feels like winter break or something for me because i'm in-between projects right now....so, i have regular hours...little to no responsibilities...it's great! but i've only got one more week of it before i start my new project at microsoft. and i have a feeling it's going to be another intense project. but oh well, hopefully it'll at least be a fun project...then the hours won't seem so long.

as for tonight...we had that basic coffeehouse. it was a really cool event cause it was almost totally organized by our student leaders. it was nice to not have to do much for it and to just watch. we had a pretty good turn out and pretty good program too. it was a great activity to have during easter weekend...really made me reflect on how much i have to be thankful for...and how awesome it is to be able to celebrate and remember what Jesus did for us.

i've also been very grateful this past week for the friendships God has blessed me with...i've had more of a chance to get to know some of the people i serve with, and i also got to know some of the people in my cg group better, and it was fun getting to talk and bake with my roomies. God has definitely been with me thru the many seasons of my life, and He is always providing me with new friends or just the right friends at the right time. thank you, Jesus!

whoo hoo! i'm finally done with my project! it feels like i just finished finals or something...yippee! also, i just did my lesson at BASIC tonight...and though it was spectacular, i think it went aight. my lesson was on "the cross"...the topic was suppsed to be Jesus' death and resurrection...i mean of all the topics to give me, it had to be this one...one that has so much to talk about, been done a billion times before, but yet have so much meaning and significance. i think the whole idea of it really scared me and put me at a total lack of confidence in myself. but God pulled me through it...and i do believe a couple of people were actually praying for me too, which always helps.

i was given the idea of using the cross as the center theme of my lesson and it worked great. oh yeah, and i gotta give mention to the book that helped me a ton too...it's called "The Jesus I Never Knew" by Philip Yancey. That too was funny how I came across it. i mean i've had this book ever since i got baptized, but never got around to reading it. and then today, for some reason i was looking thru my bookshelf and saw it. and it was perfect...it was a really good read, plus it gave me a lot of to share about. it was also God orchastrated how just this week i was shown the picture of the cross at ground zero and i was sent a devotional that all seemed to tie in together.

now that i think of it....it's just amazing!

yeah, it's been awhile hasn't it? i've been real busy for the past couple of weeks...yes, with work mostly, but there's been a whole slew of people visiting. it all started with me missing my friends and roomies, so i decide to throw an Oscar's party. but, silly me...being the novice Oscar watcher, i told everyone to come at 6:30p instead of 5:30p when it really began. who knew they actually started announcing awards at 5:30p...i really thought the first hour or so would be filled with red carpet entrances...oh well. i even made up a pretty ballot too for our oscar's pool...but that didn't work out since almost half of the awards had been anounced by the time everyone got there. i guess there's always next year!

oh well, it was good fun anyways...and i got see a bunch of friends...a whole mix of them...some from college, some from hawaii, some from church...it was great. also, visiting that same weekend was jamie...the ol' gang got together for dinner on tues night with her fam...good thai restaurant in fremont...yum! it was good to see J and i even saw mel for the first time in months!

then last weekend, my high school friend..actually long time friend since i've known her since 5th grade came and visited. she now lives in penn and we hardly get to see her since she doesn't go back to hawaii much. anyways, the the 4 of us high school girls hung out the whole weekend. it was a really special weekend....it's been awhile since i've hung out with them like that...even though two of them live in washington we don't hang out that mcuh. we did the whole tourist thing, pike's, downtown, dinner and lots of food...and we even hung out in tacoma! yeah, there really are things to see in tacoma! i was surprised...never really hung out there much or had a desire to, but since one of my friends goes to school down there we headed down on sunday. we made it to the point defiance zoo just before closing which ended up being really awesome since that's when they feed all the animals so we got to see a lot of them in action! the puffins, beluga whales and sea otters where my favorites! i could watch them for hours! we also took a tour of the outdoor exhibits of the dale chihuly collection (famous artist, does awesome glass sculptures) at the tacoma art museum. definitely gotta go back to see that!

now, i'm just wrapping up this project i'm on...one more day and i'm done...free at last! had dinner with my aunty who was in town this week for work. we ate at buca di beppo...ate WAY too much! it was good...but my stomach sure wasn't happy with me! ugh! took it too far and just couldn't enjoy it...bleh!

ok, gotta start work on my lesson and bible study for this saturday...yup..procrastinating like the champion i am!

I just came back from seeing My Fair Lady, and i guess i see why it's a classic. it's probably where the whole pretty woman type of theme came about, but i have to say that it was a bit too long. (don't read on if you don't want to ruin the story line) i think it would've been fine to end it after the ball, but instead it went on for another 30-40 minutes about who-knows-what! either that or it's just cause it lacked the chemistry between professor higgins and eliza...i began to shift uncomfortably in my chair (5th Ave seats just aren't very comfortable) thinking...man, how much longer can this go on! and the ending...well, it just didn't cut it with me...but oh well...now i understand the whole "the rain in spain falls mainly on the plain" thing. never really understood where that phrase came from.

boy, this week was long...i ended up having to work until 9pm on friday...yes, FRIDAY NITE! that really sucked, but i guess it was worth it so that i didn't have to go into work today. today i finally had a chance to relax...i slept in until 10:30a, made myself a big breakfast of waffles w/strawberries and whip cream, eggs, sausage and coffee....mmmm, my favorite! then, i went to church for prime time, and it turned out that only one of my girls showed up. which was totally ok since i had planned to just have a lite meeting. so instead of staying at church, we went to seward park and had a nice stroll around it. the first bit of exercise i've had in a loooong time. it felt good and it was good just talkin' and chillin' with one of the high school girls. then youth council meeting, basic and finally home again.

you might think that this doesn't sound like a very relaxing day, and granted it wasn't totally relaxing, but working as much as i have the past few weeks...today was definitely a nice break from it all...even if it was busy. this reminds me of a truth my friend, cassie, shared with me tonight at basic. she said that she was talking to another friend about working a lot, and she mentioned that at least she wasn't wroking as much as me or some of the other leaders, and her friend wisely reminded her that just cause she's not working as much in comparison, doesn't mean that it's not that much. just b/c cassie has friends like me and others who tend to work longer hours, that doesn't mean that it's the norm..it just means that her "norm" is getting screwed up. i don't know if that made much sense....let me put it this way....i've been working such late hours that when i got to leave early on thrusday...i left work at 7pm and i thought that was early, but that AIN'T early...it just seems like it is relative to what i've been working...but leaving at 7pm is not and should not ever be the norm that i compare things to.

ahhh...i'm just rambling and not making much sense....i should go to bed....

and the hours keep racking up! i've worked 50 hours in the past 4 days...CRAZY! but it hasn't actually been that bad (maybe i'm getting used to it)...i think it's because i'm at least doing stuff that i like versus doing lame labor intensive stuff.

on another note, i did get to go see a musical tonight in issaquah. i won these tickets thru my company's united way campaign, and they were AWESOME seats! and the show was really great too! the musical was called The Ark. going into it, i wasn't expecting much even though all of the reviews were good...i mean, come on, the story is about Noah's ark....how much can you do on a ship with a handful of people and a ton of animals?! but much to my surprise, it was a super hilarious show filled with lots of great songs and actors...and it even incorporated some simple themes of faith and prayer. i would definitely recommend seeing it, especially if you like musicals!

side note: not only was the show great, but the tickets i won were for opening night AND we had tickets in the 5th row AND they were right smack in the center AND not only that, we had seats right next to the writer of the musical!! very cool =o)

coming up next, my fair lady this sunday night....again, i have low expectations despite what i hear about it...there's just something about it that doesn't seem very interesting...but we'll see....low expectations normally mean pleasent surprises! we should all set our expectations low...j/k!

oh yeah, i've just had a really busy and long weekend...cassie and i took some of the jr high and high school girls to the Girl of Grace conference. i was very impressed by the organization and quality of the conference, it was well thought thru in terms of topics, the flow, the timing and everything. i also thought the speakers and topics were well presented...the women of point of grace were the main speakers and they each shared about topics that they dealt with growing up: boys, family, friends and their spiritual life. although the topics were not different from any other youth message, the passion these ladies shared with and their personal testimonies added a lot to these normal topics.

i guess i am also a little biased because it was put on by Point of Grace. why am i biased? because God used the music of Point of Grace to speak to me and call me to Him during the summer of 1997. it was during this summer that God opened my eyes and allowed me to see Him and to experience his love. i had a new roommate for the summer and through her influence, i began to take more of an interest in what Christianity was all about. i borrowed a Point of Grace cd from her, and began listening to it at work. i don't know how to explain it, but there was just something to their music that i found calming yet exciting...the lyrics and messages of their songs really spoke to me and helped reveal to me many different aspects of God that i never knew existed. so, yeah, i'm biased, but also extremely grateful for their songs which so clearly portrayed who Jesus is and who he could be to me. the conference was a great experience for me b/c i was blessed to see how they continue to serve the Lord and continue to share the simple truths about Jesus to young girls everywhere.

it's been awhile since i've added to my blog, and the reason i've been absent is because of the long hours i've been putting in on my project. i can't wait until i roll off and get some down time...yet, the apprehension of not knowing what i'll be doing next is starting to surface yet again. you'd think i'd get used to this feeling, but i don't...but i guess that's just a part of why i like my job; there's always something new on the horizon.

i'm almost there...thru the end of this VERY LONG week...it's been a tough one...i hope all this wear doesn't make me sick...i'm starting to feel a little stuffy...

started the 30 hour famine tonight and i've got a very full night ahead tomorrow...better hurry up and pack and then get some zzzz's...

soooo tired...

this week is going to be a killer one for me....i am so not looking forward to it....work is going to be extremely busy and we have the 30 hour famine on friday. i dunno if i'm gonna make it...i was all excited to have a saturday free, but i think i'll need it just to recoup from the week....man, weekends just aren't long enough...

on a happier note, i did a draft of my taxes...and i think i get a refund back this year! cha-ching$!

WHOO HOO!!! Vegas was awesome! A superbly fun weekend trip...I can't wait for the next one! me and my fam did a bunch of shopping, some gambling, lots of eating and more shopping!! it was great! my greatest purchase of the weekend was a new motherboard, processor and ram....*drool* fry's had their grand opening sale this past weekend in vegas and they had some great deals...soon i'll be flying on my new upgraded computer.....P4 2.5GHz w/ 512 DDR RAM!!! yippee!

my whole fam did pretty well in the gambling dept too...everyone kept hitting 4-of-a-kinds at every casino we visited! everyone but me that is....but it's ok cause i was doing pretty good at my favorite game...Let It Ride. something about this game that i just love, and no, it's not because i do well at it....it's just the thrill of winning big, and the safety of not messing up anyone else (like in blackjack). and the last night was the best ending to a sweet trip....i was on the let it ride table for like 3 hours going up and down. then, just before i decided to pack it up and head to bed, i finally hit one of the bigger hands...i got a full house! 11 to 1 odds, baby! so sweet...i know i had this dorky grin on after that...but i just couldn't help it. =oD and this was just after my fam tried to tell me that it was about time i headed up to the room...i'm glad i decided to stay for a couple hands more.

got back from vegas and went to see the producers with a bunch of friends. we went to dinner first at dragonfish...the food was pretty good, though i didn't think the service was all that great. it's kind of a family style place, but since we had a big party we all split up into smaller groups. then we went to the show....i've been waiting 3 months to see it! and i wasn't dissappointed at all....it was very funny...a parody on the entertainment industry...and on accountants! ha ha, i got a kick out of that one...i just kept picturing my old roomies singing the "unhappy" song!

oh well...all good things must come to an end...went back to work today...despite so many being off b/c of president's day....boo!

I Made It! Only one more day left...in a little over 14 hours i'll be on my way to las vegas....sin city! ha ha...but yeah, i'm way looking forward to this trip. i dunno if it's because i miss my family, miss the fun and lights 24hr a day, miss the adrenaline from gambling at all hours of the day, miss travelling, or what?! i think it's a whole combination of those things a long with the fact that when you're working long hours...you feel like you need a break BAD! i've worked 50+ hour weeks the past two weeks and i'm ready for some rest and relaxation! i know, it doesn't sound like much to some of you career folks, but for me...that's enuff! at least it's still semi-fun...i'm not the bitter working woman yet!

more to come when i return....do i win big?! or shop, shop, shop!?

man, i don't know where my weekends go! they just seem to fly by...

this is gonna be a super long week for me...got so many meetings and deadlines for work. thank goodness it's only a 4-day week for me and then i get to jet off to VEGAS!!! i can't wait! it's been so long since i've been there, and i'm looking forward to seeing my grandma. i've been worried about her since my grandpa's passing. i hope she's doing ok, and that the trip will be good for her. it will also be good to see how my mom and aunty are doing too! ha ha, funny how i'm actually looking forward to spending time with family...and in vegas of all places! *sigh* it does make me miss my grandpa though...

yeah...soooo....ask me how my lesson went tonight.....it sucked!! man, i can't believe how bad it was....but i guess i deserved it, huh? after i was done, i just wanted to crawl up into a hole and hide. i'm so glad there weren't many kids there to see me flounder, flail and FAIL!! and i don't mean to whine about it (b/c i really do deserve it for putting off planning my lesson until today), but i was seriously feeling good about my lesson this afternoon. i mean, i woke up early....studied the various sections of the NT that spoke of Jesus feeding the 5,000...came up with some pretty decent points...came up with a good applicaton point...and i even made a pretty cool powerpoint presentation, and i accomplished all of this before my bible study so i didn't even have to do any last minute scurrying. but, alas, what i did not do was put much thought into the way i would start, transition and the examples i would use. i also didn't print off the slides like i should've done to use as notes....but just a couple of hours before my lesson, i ran thru the slides with some of the other leaders and i felt i knew it pretty well. but... I DIDN'T. i ended up starting horribly, forgetting every point on each slide, i jumped around from topic to topic cause i couldn't remember what was on my slides, i brought up examples that i couldn't explain very well and i felt like i kept repeating the same thing over and over....i haven't felt this bad speaking in a long time!! i almost wanted to stop in the middle, apologize and excuse myself from the room...but instead, i waded thru the mess i had made and wrapped it up as fast as i could.

yeesh...i sure hope i learn my lesson from all of this...and i don't blame God for not helping me thru it...i think i was depending too much on my abilities and not enuff on him...in fact, the only good point is that i'm thankful it was a small group, only about 10 kids. definitely not a good end to my week...

eek! i'm up so early on a saturday morning! why do i always do this to myself...wait until the day of to start planning my lesson for youth group. it's really lame, but yet so familiar. i mean, i've done this my entire life with school projects, papers and tests. i seem to thrive on the last-minute rush and intense study and immersion into whatever it is that i need to get done. but really, that was fine and dandy for school...i really should try and break this habit...i mean it's really not giving my best and all to God! haha, funny how my lesson kinda has to do with just that, but in a positive reinforcement way. my lesson tonight is supposed to be on Jesus feeding the 5,000. and one thing i've learned from it is that we need to bring whatever we have to Jesus and trust that he will provide and use it for something much greater. so you see, even though it is rather late for me to be starting this lesson, i know that He can use whatever i do bring to Him...even if it is last minute. i know, not a really good way of thinking...and probably contradictory to some other teaching in the Bible....actually here it is: Mark 12:41-44 i had to go and find it...i can't have bad positive reinforcement ruling my life.

oh yeah, and i was the biggest flake this week! it came down to just 4 of us going to whistler and i decided that i didn't want to go anymore, i wanted to go to vegas instead. so i ended up having to tell my friend (who really wanted to go). the others didn't really care, but i know i was the biggest flake! i hate being a flake and i hate flakes! grrr...why do i always put myself in these situations. oh well, maybe i can make it up to him by planning a trip to whistler during some other weekend.

ok, must get some coffee going and start working on my lesson!

boy, it's been awhile since i've been here...i don't know if this blog is worth keeping up or not. but, alas...i need something to make me stay up even later than i should! anyways, i just wanted to write about how crappy things are going with my search and hope of going to whistler this winter season. i think i've been to whistler every winter for the past 4 or 5 years, and sadly it looks like it's just not going to happen this year =o( maybe it's just not meant to be, i mean i've never had such a difficult time finding a place to stay at. i think we've found like 4 or 5 perfectly fine places to stay and then it either doesn't work out because we took too long, or because now it's hard to find enough people to come. it's getting pretty late in the game now...i'm about ready to throw in the towel.

and actually, come to think of it...i have kinda given up hope cause i'm already thinking of what else i can do that weekend...maybe a quick trip to vegs to meet up with some of my fam or maybe a trip down south to socal to visit some friends there, or maybe a more closer and local ski trip. either way, i'm determined to go and do something that weekend...i mean, it's not often that i have an entire weekend free!

but we'll see what happens...i need to get some zzzs though before i catch that cold going around!

man, what a day! sometimes, my saturdays just seem so long...i forget why i'm doing it all. it always starts off with me trying to sleep in, but having to eventually get up to finish prepping...or sometimes start working on....the bible study for my prime time group. i end up working on it all morning and then end up rushing out the door like a maniac cause i'm running late. i usually arrive at church just in time and meet with my group...then there's the basic leader's meeting...trying to organize or talk to different people...basic...the afterwards catch up and hang out...driving kids home...and then finally returning home. in all that craze and busyness, i often wonder why...why do i devote my entire saturday or a good 8-10 hours of it to do all of this?

and then God somehow brings a little glimpse of why...why He has placed such a love and devotion to these kids on my heart. he gives me glimpses like a student finally opening up and sharing a little bit more to me after years of small talk, or an amazement of the variety and often crazy ways God draws his children to him, or actually receiving encouragement from students that seem to just care about themselves, or being amazed at how a relationship can make such an impact on a student's life, and the list could go on and on. but in the end, it's simply because i feel that though i may have fun doing some other things for myself on saturdays, it would just pale in comparision to being able to witness God at work in the lives of the youth...heck, i can even be right there witnesseing it first hand, and wonder how i am so blessed to be a part of His work...even if i am insignificant to it.

my only worry is that i hope i don't ever forget just why i am there....and that i don't end up doing it for my own glory or significance...
"Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ" Galatians 1:10

geez, it's been a long time! well, i guess that's a good thing (sort of) b/c it means that i'm not staying up late online...but it could also mean that i haven't had anything of much to write about. it could also be b/c i've been working like 9-10hr days m-f and i don't feel like going on the computer when i get home....imagine that! yeah, my project is going ok...not the greatest, but i'm not totally hating it either...i think the fact that i know i'll be done with it by mid-march keeps me pretty sane. but i am getting to that "no-good" place of starting to talk like getting off of work at 6:30 or 7:00pm is "early" or a good thing! i really hate it when things start to feel "normal" just cause you've been accepting it for awhile....working more than 8hrs a day should NOT be normal....tolerated at times...but NOT normal! i must keep reminding myself this b/c work is NOT my life.

as for other things....i know it sounds really crazy, but i'm really liking this new show the bachelorette...like the bachelor, but instead of one guy and many women, it's one woman and many "pleasing to the eyes" guys. one of them in particular makes me very happy to watch =o) the show hooked me in the second he came on! i don't know if this show will go much farther for me if he gets "let go"....i really hope he makes it to the final 2! something about guys with josh hartnett looks, a great sense of humor, a romantic poet and a fireman all rolled into one that makes the show soooo worth watching!

btw...i decided to stay with the community group...it's a good study and discussion of the Word and it's nice to get to know some people i don't know so well.

man, the days just seem to fly by now! i think i'm getting a little too busy now....but it's still in that "pretty good" phase of things. you know, when you are still enjoying everything you're doing, and it's only when you look back or forward on your schedule that you realize you have a pretty full schedule. it's not overwhelming...yet.

so, work has definitely picked up...who'd a thought configuring a package software would require so much work....i still definitely like developing custom apps with java much better! (boy, that sure sounded like a lame techie thing to say....oh well, i can't help who i am) but it's pretty crazy how it's only the 2 week of our project and i'm already working from 8a-7p almost everyday...it normal starts with regular 40hr days and then builds until it's about 2/3 of the way done. at least it's fun working with the people on my team...this team has actually turned out to be pretty cool and fun.

as for my night life...yeah, crazy, huh?....i work 10 hours a day and still have a night life. well, i guess you would call it a night life....but anyways, i'm in the process of checking out bsf and community groups. not sure which i want to join...they both have pros and cons to them...actually they both have good pros and the cons are just lame so i shouldn't even think about them. hmm...yeah...i know...not a life or death decision, but still i find myself pondering it a lot. oh well...i'm sure i'll make a decision by next week....it really is too much to go to bible study on monday and tuesday nights!!

what else do i have in the works? trying to get a group of friends to go up to whistler president's day weekend...i've gone every year for the past 4 years...it's kinda like a tradition for me...except the people that go are different. but i did find a really cheap place...that means even more of an incentive to go! i wonder what the snow fall has been this year...it's been pretty warm down here. guess i should go check it.

last night was pretty fun, i had dinner and drinks with some friends i haven't seen in awhile. we went to the taphouse grill which has 160 different beers on tap! i've never seen so many different types of beers, and since i don't really drink beer i wasn't too excited about it. but i did have a sip of every beer that one of my friends tried and i have to say, i was pretty impressed with some. the whole nitro thing is really good stuff...makes the beer less carbonated and gassy...more smooth. and there was even this one beer, yakima something-or-other, that even had a somewhat coffee-ish after taste...yummy. gotta try that one again =o)