man, what a day! sometimes, my saturdays just seem so long...i forget why i'm doing it all. it always starts off with me trying to sleep in, but having to eventually get up to finish prepping...or sometimes start working on....the bible study for my prime time group. i end up working on it all morning and then end up rushing out the door like a maniac cause i'm running late. i usually arrive at church just in time and meet with my group...then there's the basic leader's meeting...trying to organize or talk to different people...basic...the afterwards catch up and hang out...driving kids home...and then finally returning home. in all that craze and busyness, i often wonder why...why do i devote my entire saturday or a good 8-10 hours of it to do all of this?

and then God somehow brings a little glimpse of why...why He has placed such a love and devotion to these kids on my heart. he gives me glimpses like a student finally opening up and sharing a little bit more to me after years of small talk, or an amazement of the variety and often crazy ways God draws his children to him, or actually receiving encouragement from students that seem to just care about themselves, or being amazed at how a relationship can make such an impact on a student's life, and the list could go on and on. but in the end, it's simply because i feel that though i may have fun doing some other things for myself on saturdays, it would just pale in comparision to being able to witness God at work in the lives of the youth...heck, i can even be right there witnesseing it first hand, and wonder how i am so blessed to be a part of His work...even if i am insignificant to it.

my only worry is that i hope i don't ever forget just why i am there....and that i don't end up doing it for my own glory or significance...
"Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ" Galatians 1:10

geez, it's been a long time! well, i guess that's a good thing (sort of) b/c it means that i'm not staying up late online...but it could also mean that i haven't had anything of much to write about. it could also be b/c i've been working like 9-10hr days m-f and i don't feel like going on the computer when i get home....imagine that! yeah, my project is going ok...not the greatest, but i'm not totally hating it either...i think the fact that i know i'll be done with it by mid-march keeps me pretty sane. but i am getting to that "no-good" place of starting to talk like getting off of work at 6:30 or 7:00pm is "early" or a good thing! i really hate it when things start to feel "normal" just cause you've been accepting it for awhile....working more than 8hrs a day should NOT be normal....tolerated at times...but NOT normal! i must keep reminding myself this b/c work is NOT my life.

as for other things....i know it sounds really crazy, but i'm really liking this new show the bachelorette...like the bachelor, but instead of one guy and many women, it's one woman and many "pleasing to the eyes" guys. one of them in particular makes me very happy to watch =o) the show hooked me in the second he came on! i don't know if this show will go much farther for me if he gets "let go"....i really hope he makes it to the final 2! something about guys with josh hartnett looks, a great sense of humor, a romantic poet and a fireman all rolled into one that makes the show soooo worth watching!

btw...i decided to stay with the community group...it's a good study and discussion of the Word and it's nice to get to know some people i don't know so well.

man, the days just seem to fly by now! i think i'm getting a little too busy now....but it's still in that "pretty good" phase of things. you know, when you are still enjoying everything you're doing, and it's only when you look back or forward on your schedule that you realize you have a pretty full schedule. it's not overwhelming...yet.

so, work has definitely picked up...who'd a thought configuring a package software would require so much work....i still definitely like developing custom apps with java much better! (boy, that sure sounded like a lame techie thing to say....oh well, i can't help who i am) but it's pretty crazy how it's only the 2 week of our project and i'm already working from 8a-7p almost everyday...it normal starts with regular 40hr days and then builds until it's about 2/3 of the way done. at least it's fun working with the people on my team...this team has actually turned out to be pretty cool and fun.

as for my night life...yeah, crazy, huh?....i work 10 hours a day and still have a night life. well, i guess you would call it a night life....but anyways, i'm in the process of checking out bsf and community groups. not sure which i want to join...they both have pros and cons to them...actually they both have good pros and the cons are just lame so i shouldn't even think about them. hmm...yeah...i know...not a life or death decision, but still i find myself pondering it a lot. oh well...i'm sure i'll make a decision by next week....it really is too much to go to bible study on monday and tuesday nights!!

what else do i have in the works? trying to get a group of friends to go up to whistler president's day weekend...i've gone every year for the past 4 years...it's kinda like a tradition for me...except the people that go are different. but i did find a really cheap place...that means even more of an incentive to go! i wonder what the snow fall has been this year...it's been pretty warm down here. guess i should go check it.

last night was pretty fun, i had dinner and drinks with some friends i haven't seen in awhile. we went to the taphouse grill which has 160 different beers on tap! i've never seen so many different types of beers, and since i don't really drink beer i wasn't too excited about it. but i did have a sip of every beer that one of my friends tried and i have to say, i was pretty impressed with some. the whole nitro thing is really good stuff...makes the beer less carbonated and gassy...more smooth. and there was even this one beer, yakima something-or-other, that even had a somewhat coffee-ish after taste...yummy. gotta try that one again =o)

saw the bachelorette premiere tonight, and i am really impressed with the guy selection! i think i'm gonna have to keep watching this show...something about firemen that just gotta make you smile =o)

tonight...gotta try to get to sleep early...not doing so well right now with the waking up really early and going to bed really late. it's weird working back in seattle again after working out-of-town for so long...i thought it would be so easy to come back...but it's actually harder than i thought...i have to figure out a whole new routine or figure out how to balance hanging out, working, ministry and spending time with God. unfortunately, guess which part is suffering the most. =o(

second day on my new project today and things are not looking that bad...i think i may even actually like this project. see i was all thinking that i've been so blessed with so many great projects that i was due for a bad one, i even met my new teammates and thought "ooh, not sure if i'm gonna get along with this gang"...but low and behold...they are actually decent people! praise God! i don't know why i keep getting blessed with great projects...but hey! i'm not one to complain.

on another note, i went to my first full basic leaders meeting tonight. i know, doesn't sound like all that much fun...but i actually enjoy attending these meetings and have missed all of them since i was working out of town. i don't know what it is...maybe i just like getting together with the other leaders to share and talk...maybe my "admin" side likes all the planning that goes on...maybe it's just cause i love what we do so much...or maybe it's a combo of all of these things and the fact that i'm just plain "weird". we had a great time of prayer too tonight...prayed for all them students that have been coming...we've totally been blessed this year with the opportunity to get to know so many new students...a totally diverse group of kids...truly a sampling of how great and huge God's love is.

my roomies all returned today...yay! i'm truly amazed at how things have worked out so far with the new roomies...sure, i haven't been here much during the past 4 months, but still...i think it's gonna be ok...maybe even great! =o) i'll check back in about 2 months after i've lived here for a steady time. but really, how could i not love roomies that support my homies collection and can buy and make "duk"?!

on another note, it was really awesome being at church this weekend...it really is my second home and i felt like i had been away from it for a really long time. it's like having a close extended family...i really missed the people there. at communion today, i was so moved by the thought that this second family and the love i feel here was all made possible thru Jesus...before meeting Jesus i never imagined that i would be in a place or have the life i am having now...the scary thing is that i know that things can't stay the same forever and eventually God may ask me to move somewhere else...that's gonna be a hard thing to do.

i'm back in seattle and feeling like crap...i dunno what happened i was fine up until dinner before leaving for the airport, then BAM! i got hit by this cold thing...i felt totally wasted by the time i arrived in seattle and i still had to make it thru my prime time meeting and basic.....but i survived...now i need to get some good zzzs.

i'm heading back to seattle tomorrow night....here's a run down of all the movies i saw during this holiday vacation:
Blue Crush, Men in Black 2, Lilo and Stitch (2nd time), The Two Towers (2nd time), Two Weeks Notice, Divine Secrets of the Ya-ya Sisterhood, Mr Deeds, Crossroads, Catch Me If You Can, Maid in Manhatten (2nd time), XXX, Life As A House, Ballistic, Pretty Woman, Drumline.

Yes, you can say that my family and i went a little movie crazy...but hey, that's what my family likes to do together!

went to the beach today...my last chance to try and get some sun on my gleaming white, kinda scary, japanese tourist looking skin...it was overcast when i set out, drizzling a little when i finally reached the beach...but after about 45 minutes of patiently waiting...the sun came out! hallelujah! it turned into a great day for the beach, had lunch brought to the beach, ate lunch with friends, then headed into the water. it was great...then to cap of the day at the beach we went to waiola's to get some yummy shave ice! best shave ice on the island...i always have to go there once before leaving.

got home and to my pleasant surprise...i do believe i got a slight shade darker. hee hee, good ole uv rays did their job! yippee!

happy new years!

it was a pretty tame new years this year...just spent time with the fam...this vacation has just been about spending time with the fam...learning more about each other. i hope this year will be more of the same. i kinda feel like i'm finally "all grown up" and i'm feeling like i was a lame, naive kid growing up...never really appreciating my family or my relatives. i mean, i never even took the time to learn who everyone was or even attempt at trying to remember them all...it was always just "aunty" or "uncle"...forget the names and relationships. but now, family is starting to mean more to me...too bad i had to wait until now to start taking more of an interest.

as for the rest of new years day...it started off with the traditional fried mochi with kinako that my dad always makes, then off to a 10 course chinese lunch that was super ono, then to our next stop at aunty kay's house where we sit around and talk for awhile until we feel we can stuff a little more food into our stomachs...after that took a brief pit stop/rest stop at home before heading out to another cousin's house for more food and dessert. man, i can't believe how much i ate today! but oh so good! and it was really fun seeing all the cousins again...most of us are out of college now so we're all kinda on equal levels now. it was a lot of fun!